Carlsbad day spa pampers former foster youth

By: ALEXANDRA DELUCA - For the North County Times | Sunday, July 9, 2006 11:55 PM PDT ∞

CARLSBAD ---- Once a month, Tranquility by the Sea day spa owner Shari Reabold sets aside an entire day so she and her staff can pamper a very special client. No other appointments are booked all day so that this particular woman can enjoy a variety of luxurious spa services, including facials, massages, hand and foot treatments, professional makeup, hairstyling, and a gourmet lunch ---- in peace and privacy.

Who is this VIP? She's not a celebrity, but she is a star ---- a "star of the month," that is, at Mary's House Transitional Living Program in Escondido.

Mary's House, which is operated by the YMCA Youth and Family Services under the direction of Laura Mustari, is an 18-month transitional living program for young women ages 16 to 24 who have recently transitioned out of San Diego's Foster Care System.

The goal of the program is to provide the women with shelter, training and support to help them successfully transition into a self-sufficient and independent life.

Each month, the staff and residents at Mary's House choose a "star of the month" ---- a resident who is working or going to school full time, fulfilling all of her obligations and successfully working toward her self-identified goals. One of the perks of being selected: a day of pampering at Tranquility by the Sea.

The collaboration began last October, when Reabold approached Mary's House to offer her services.

"You get to a point where you really want to give back to the community," said Reabold.

The idea behind the spa day, Reabold said, is to boost the self-image and self-esteem of these young women, many of whom have been in foster care their entire lives.

"They have not been given a break," said Reabold. "They're feeling so poorly about themselves. We want them to have a truly special day." Ý

Krysta Creighton, interim program director of Mary's House, said Reabold's offer was perfect timing, noting that a spa that had offered similar services to Mary's House residents had recently closed.

"It's just so nice to have somebody pamper them," Creighton said. "It's a totally new thing for them. They've never had this kind of treatment." Ý

One of the first women to experience the day of pampering was Lacy Harden, 20, who has since graduated from Mary's House.

"I didn't really want to do it at first," Harden said. "I'm not the typical girlie-girl type. I wasn't sure exactly what they were going to do or who these people were, so I was super nervous." Ý

Noni Kondyra, an aesthetician and makeup artist at Tranquility by the Sea, said Harden's reaction was typical.

"They start out so timid ---- they all have their armor up," said Kondyra. "But they spend a few minutes with us and know that we're safe." Ý

Said Harden: "As soon as they started talking, my nervousness went away almost completely."

Over the next few hours, Harden was given a facial, enjoyed a warm stone massage, had her makeup done and even tried sushi for the first time during lunch. Although she loved the massage ---- "Oh my God, it was amazing" ---- Harden said the best part about her experience was getting to know the staff at the spa.

"What made it so special was the people," Harden said. "They were so supportive. They really care. Sometimes it can be hard to find that in the foster care system." Ý

At the end of the day, Harden was given a "love" bag full of bath, body and beauty products that were donated by clients at the spa.

"Our clients have been so enthusiastic about this," Reabold said, who said the response has been overwhelming ever since she solicited items through the newsletter she sends to all of her clients.

Kondyra said the entire experience is designed to show the young women that people truly care about their welfare.

"We just hope that they know that somebody loves them," she said.

Harden said that although she has always been insecure about her appearance, she felt beautiful when she walked out of the spa.

"They totally made me comfortable in my own skin," she said.

"We really interpret their inner beauty," said Jacqueline Wilson, a hairstylist at Creative Hair Studio in Carlsbad who has recently teamed up with Reabold and Kondyra to offer her services to the women of Mary's House. "They don't know how to express it because they haven't been given the tools. We bring that inside to the outside and show them how beautiful they are." Ý

Creighton said the change in the women is obvious at the end of the day.

"You go pick them up, and their faces are glowing," Creighton said. "They have the best time. These girls just love it." Ý

"I didn't want to leave," noted Harden.

Creighton said that aside from providing extra incentive for the women at Mary's House to succeed, the spa days instill a newfound sense of self-confidence and self-worth.

"It leaves such a lasting impression," she said.

Harden agreed.

"Ever since then, it's made me a different person," she said. "It made me so much more comfortable with myself. It was just life changing, it really was."

Reabold said the partnership is just as rewarding for her and her staff.

"It is an honor to work with and help these girls," she said. "It gives us all so much hope."

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